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Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Life is too fragile.....

I never thought of “What is life” and “What is the purpose of life?”. Last week, it was just a shock to me. A series of incident happened that make me flash back to what is life all about and have I done enough for me and my loved ones.


1/5 - Labour Day. Of course this is a happy day for ppl like us… the kuli kang…. Celebrate my grandm
82th birthday together with my extended family members i.e. aunties and uncles….cousins… Long time din take extended family picture. Tonight, dad requested us to take as he needs to e mail the pic to one of his relative in China whom he and mum visited last week….. *SNAP* here we go… the memories….



2/5 - Normal working day as usual



3/5 - Saturday….. nothing much happened



4/5 - Sunday… as usual… nothing much happened… normal…. But parents going to this tua pek kong parade…. One of the contingent…so I have made up my mind to have dinner with my bro and sis in law….. about 5pm, sis in law called…. Telling me her uncle passed away…. You must be wondering, my sis in law uncle passed away…. Anything to do with me?? The relationship between my sis in law family member and I are very unique… we are close to each other…. I can even join her family trip to places like rainforest even without my bro, sis in law or my parents around….so u can roughly know how close are we…. And also her uncle used to be very very sick (sudden) since Oct 2007 and he was admitted to hospital in Kuch since then. Thank God, he recovered end on Dec 2007 and managed to come back to Miri to rest during end of Dec 2007. My family paid him a visit after he came back. When I saw him tat time, I was really shocked….. he used to be medium big in size and he turned out to be half his size before! His hair turned white and fall…. He was sitting on the wheel chair and gave us a weak smile “Can still recognize uncle ma” my eyes turn into red…. Holding back my tears… I hold his hand and said, of cos I can still recognize you uncle…. After that day… I din visit him… but do hear the news from my sis in law saying tat he recovered steadily…. And he manage to drive…. I was so happy to hear that… during CNY, my family visited his house and his family also came to my house…. This time, he really turn back into the “old” uncle that I used to know….. just tat he cant stand for long…. After CNY, his son decided to bring him back to Kuch to do normal check up…. And out of sudden, the doc told him tat he had blood cancer…. And requested him to undergo certain treatment….. he has no choice but to go… after the first treatment, he felt he cant stand it anymore…. And the doc gave up…. And he just have to discharged from the hospital and stay at a rented hse in kuch to seek for other help…. His sons done all they can and also looked for Chinese medicine…. But, in the end, he still have to end his life…. I was so sad to see this happened!



5/5 - Monday morning, gonna work… not really in the mood as still feel the sarrow….go home a bit early today after work to go to sis in law uncle;s hse to pay last respect…. Funeral service in church the next day… I have made up my mind to go as well tomorrow….take few hrs leave…. Stay at the hse til quite late…. All this while, I don’t dare to go near the coffin and look into in… but this round, I made it…. I starred at the coffin and my tears just rolled down automatically….. seeing the wife, I felt so sorry for her… luckily all his sons are old enough to take care of themselves and the mum…. All working and 2 of the sons married already….
About 11pm, still at the house…. Dad handphone suddenly rings…. It normally don’t ring so late at night….. it’s a bad news…. One of my uncle being admitted to the hospital and is in very critical situation (this uncle is still young, aged 50 years old)…. After my dad finish talking over the phone…. He walked towards us (me, my bro, my sis in law and my mum) and tell us the news. My dad shaked for a while and my bro managed to hold his hand asked what happened to you. My dad just blured and nearly fainted and fall down. At that time, me who was standing in front of him quickly hug him…. I saw his eyes turn into white colour and giggles I shouted “pls don’t” my mind is blank… I really dunno what to do but just shout and pray no one take away my dad… my mum was so scared that she shouted and put her hand into my dad mouth… luckily there were many ppl ard and all of the come near us and help to save my dad….. finally my dad regained his conscious….. we stayed at the hse til about 1 am to wait til my dad regained his energy…. Dad din go to the hospital as he is not fit to go. Informed my relatives who were in the hospital my dad condition and unable to make it to the hospital. Cant sleep well whole night…. Scared….



6/5 - Woke up early….when I see my dad, he says nothing about my uncle. For me, no new means good new. So as normal, change into my office wear and and decided to go to office earlier as I need to go out for a while to attend my sis in law uncle funeral. Just when I start my car engine and wanted to go to the office, my bro came out and told me my uncle passed away….. it was really a shock to me… I cant believed it…. 5 days back, we still sat together to celebrate my grandma birthday….. really cant believe it… life is just too fragile!!!




So those series of incident really make me things….. why life so fragile….. how can I live my live to fullest…and one thing for sure… I never knew my dad is getting old after all this incident….. I think I have not done enough to take care of him…. I really need to do something…. Young ppl can die also….. so I really need to look into what is life…. What are the things in life that I really want to do….Frankly speaking, I have contributed quite a massive of my time in studies and work so far… these will no longer be first in my life… too tired with work so far……

4 comments:

Jennifer Kho said...

*sigh* There are too many uncertainties in life. Must cherish what we have now. Be strong.....

*Hug Hug*

Jane Jane said...

Sigh...life is indeed fragile and full of uncertainties :( i know how difficult this must have been for u, i could feel your sadness and sorrow...hang on there kat...you have my moral support

Tracy said...

ya... life is really fully for uncertainties... we don't know what will happen tomorrow! So live your life to the fullnest each day, treat it as it is your last day!
Show your love your your family and friends before it is too late!

Alicia said...

oh no... didnt hear you saying that.. you will be very sad when you know someone very close to you is going 6 ft down....... i know the feeling... cheer up.... call us out if you want